Check out the shades, the colorful jacket, the giant red tennis racket and moon-sized tennis ball around the 18-time Grand Slam singles champion. Apparently cocaine was rampant among ad execs in the '80s.
New York Yankees
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We're pretty sure Mickey's YooHoo bottle wasn't filled with YooHoo.
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Hmmm... not so sure that tagline would work today.
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We apologize; really should have had a warning before this one. But yes, the Orioles Hall of Fame pitcher did help popularize the banana hammock.
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Nothing says bad-ass football player like shoulder pads, eye black and perfectly coiffed hair thickened by elegant mousse.
Mean Joe Greene
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Note how much the tailor is sweating. Apparently he got a good peek at Mean Joe's package.
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The Boz was a favorite target for fans’ animosity, but we all appreciated him in the cinematic achievement that was Stone Cold. He was better-equipped to fight in that movie than against Bo Jackson.
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Speaking of Bo, these Nike campaigns were huge. No jokes here; the guy was just an amazing athlete until the injuries started. He won a Heisman and played in the all-star game of both MLB and the NFL. And he did it all shirtless.
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The all-time steals leader is a tough act to follow on the diamond and with money quotes off the field. Former teammate Steve Finley to Rickey on a team flight: “You have tenure, sit wherever you want.” Henderson to Finley: “Ten years? Rickey’s been playing at least 16, 17 years.”
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Behold, the Golden Bear is rocking some white short-shorts. Can’t criticize the 18-time Major winner though; just going to blame the '70s.
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Speaking of old-school shorts that make you feel uncomfortable, everybody remembers a former football coach sporting these bad boys. At least the former Cowboys quarterback doesn’t have a mesh hat and gut like your high school coach.
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The former Braves owner and CNN founder is dubbed “Captain Outrageous” in this ad. Of course, he did once name himself manager for a day (a loss) before it was deemed to be in violation of MLB rules. Can you imagine Turner in a baseball uniform?
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Boom! Gotta love the former coach and broadcaster helping you out with car care. No doubt Brett Favre would have sponsored this as well if he had not been at Southern Miss at the time.
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Is anything more '80s than those Maverick-from-Top Gun pair of Ray-Bans? You know it’s been a few years when a player (called "Mr. May" by New York owner George Steinbrenner) had to leave the Yankees to win a World Series.
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Talk about an old-school ad. The former Oklahoma State and Dallas Cowboys running back was truly a cowboy, moonlighting in the offseason on the professional rodeo circuit.
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These old-school Converse shoes were classic in the 1980s, and Larry Bird and Magic Johnson were perfect pitchmen. Note just how ripped they both look.
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Yes kids, that old dude on the Kardashians was a big deal. Ironically, he's hocking cameras.
Smoking, Part Deux
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Camels were apparently it for the top players back in the day. So rich, so mild!
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Nothing says great dental hygiene like a pickup game in the park.
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You can almost hear the tennis great yelling at the photographer.
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Mr. October definitely stirred the drink in New York. How about the old-school electronics?
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The seven-time Grand Slam singles champion should be selling mustaches, not cameras.
Poor judgement costs both the All-Star catcher and his team.
Watching the tension-filled Cardinals-Brewers game Tuesday, I was prepared for some kind of fireworks. What I didn’t see coming was St. Louis catcher Yadier Molina going ballistic. The All-Star catcher has been hitting well this season, and has been as stellar behind the plate as usual. He’s been a steady producer in a lineup of big hitters and has been a steadying influence for the pitching staff.
So why did Molina fly off the handle Tuesday night? There didn’t seem to be anything brewing between Yadi and home plate umpire Rob Drake. In fact, Drake seemed tardy in warning both benches when Cardinals reliever Jason Motte’s first attempt to hit Ryan Braun failed.
And the pitch that Drake called Molina out on just wasn’t that bad. In fact, it could have been argued by the Brewers had it been called a ball. Evidently, Molina felt the Cardinals’ pitchers weren’t getting the same breaks their opponents were from Drake. But isn’t there a better, more diplomatic way to handle that?
I’m not sure what, but I believe it was more than just one missed pitch that lit Molina’s fuse. He exploded as I’ve never seen before. And his actions will hurt his team. If Molina doesn’t appeal the suspension, which all players do, he’ll miss some or all of the Milwaukee series in St. Louis next week. If he accepts the punishment beginning tonight at Florida, he’ll miss the first game Tuesday night against the Brew Crew — if none of the four scheduled games in Florida are hurricaned out. At any rate, this is not a time for the Cardinals to lose their catcher.
Molina has been one of my favorite players to watch. He battles at the plate, is a defensive force behind it and has a cannon. But this time, his poor judgment could cost his team. And why? No sound reason at all.
Winners Philadelphia Phillies
After making a run at Carlos Beltran of the Mets, the Phillies acquired Hunter Pence (right) from Houston. It would have been a surprise had the Mets actually dealt with a division rival. It was also surprising that the Phillies focused their efforts on improving their lineup. They must believe getting Brad Lidge back will be enough to deepen their bullpen, which actually had been a strength this season despite being hit hard with injuries.
Strengthened their bullpen with two of the dominant setup men in the game in Mike Adams from San Diego and Koji Uehara from Baltimore. With closer Neftali Feliz set for the ninth inning, Adams and Uehara essential turn Texas games into 6-inning games. In the 95 innings the two have combined to pitch this season, they have 11 strikeouts and only 17 walks with a 1.42 ERA. As the rotation begins to tire, taking pressure off the starters to go deep into games should really bolster the staff. The Texas offense should continue to be no problem. These moves also give the Rangers a better chance to compete with New York and Boston in the playoffs. Right now, the Rangers might be favored in a series with either team.
The Braves traded youngster Jordan Schafer and two Double-AA starters to obtain the MLB steals leader Michael Bourn from Houston. With catcher Brian McCann out for significant time with a rib cage injury, the Braves desperately need to boost their lineup. Chipper Jones should return this week to improve the middle of the order, but Bourn provides a spark at the top of a lineup that will rely more on manufacturing runs. With a pitching staff that keeps the Braves in just about every game, using speed to put pressure on defenses will serve Atlanta well.
It may not be enough to finish off the deal in the AL Central, but acquiring Ubaldo Jimenez was a coup for the upstart Indians. If nothing else, the organization has convinced its fans that it is serious this season. Jimenez, who can be a horse atop the rotation for the stretch drive, is under contract for less than $10 million per season through 2014.
San Francisco Giants
The Giants were able to procure the bat they needed in the middle of their order in Carlos Beltran (right) without giving up multiple players. Blessed with young pitching, the organization felt it could part with Zack Wheeler, a top-50 type prospect currently at the Single-A level.
Suffering through the longest losing streak in franchise history as the trade deadline dawned, the Mariners had a few trading chips and landed lefthander Charlie Furbush and outfielder Casper Wells from the Tigers. Then the M’s received Trayvon Robinson from the Dodgers in a deal that sent Erik Bedard to the Red Sox. Seattle did not have to give up ace Felix Hernandez and improved its organization for the next 3-5 years.
Obviously going nowhere this season, the Orioles parted ways with veteran Derrek Lee and setup man Koji Uehara. In return, the Orioles received Chris Davis, who they believe will be their first baseman of the future and Tommy Hunter, who could become their ace next season. Baltimore now has talented young players at just about every position as well as some young talent in the rotation. The future really is getting brighter in Baltimore.
Having traded or demoted five of the eight Opening Day starters this season, the Astros appear several years from seeing any fruits of their rebuilding efforts. At the same time, there is currently not enough continuity for fans to hang onto. Expect a few more seasons hitting the century mark in losses.
Los Angeles Angels
The Angels don’t exactly have the meat in the lineup or the depth in the bullpen to compete with the Rangers. By standing pat, it’s almost as if the Angels are giving up. Not a great message to fans. In its defense, the organization doesn’t want to do anything to compromise the future to take what could be a long shot to win in 2011.
Long out of the race and burdened with a roster filled with veterans with huge contracts, the Cubs were unable to accelerate any rebuilding process by trading veterans for youngsters. Carlos Zambrano was available, but there were no takers. The only two significant trading chips — Marlon Byrd, who has been injured, and closer Carlos Marmol — apparently weren’t discussed at a high level. The Cubs were able to unload Kosuke Fukudome as a salary dump to the Indians, but received very little in return.
Follow Charlie Miller on Twitter @AthlonCharlie or email him at Charlie.Miller@AthlonSports.com.